THE COMPLETE SHRUB LINGO DICTIONARY

Bordello or Bordello House - when things get really crazy. Usually exclaimed in a state of wildness, eg. "BORDELLOOOOO!"

LOM Dots - any succession of periods, especially in silly places.

Grok - to understand something. eg. "I grok you, Daddy-O!"

Dangleberries - little shit crusties hanging on your ass hairs. Often used as an insult, eg. "That guy is a real dangleberry-head."

Bhehrehre! - all purpose exclamation, can be used to show feelings of excitement, amusement, anger, fear, sadness or amazement. eg. "Bherher!" or "My brother just died! Bherehrre!" or "That's a funny one! Bherehrer!" or "I just won a million dollars! Bherherher!" or "Time to make the donuts, you bastards! Bherhehre!"

Paaah! - usually used to reply to someone's use of "Bherher!", can also be substituted for "Bherere!" in your day-to-day conversation, although it is generally used to express gloating or pleasure. eg. "I just defeated you forthe 2342th consecutive time! PaaAaah!" or "Paaah! That meat pie wasscrumptious."

Raisin Bag - when your scrotum shrivels up to a very tiny size, you aresuffering from raisin bag. Usually caused by immersion in extremely cold water or by extremely unattractive women, usually women with cottage cheese legs. eg. "If I go swimming in that fricking freezing water, I'll have raisin bag for the rest of my life! No way." or "Whenever I look at Dodger's girlfriend, I get a bad case of raisin bag. Blech!"

Rock Lobster - when something is really fine. Substitute for the word "excellent". eg. "Rock Lobster, dewwwwwds!"

Cottage Cheese Legs - when a person is really fat and his/her legs get allmushy with cellulose and has stretch marks, he/she is said to have this.

Red Shirts - suicidal persons. Taken from the red-shirted security officersin Star Trek who die by the thousands every episode. eg. "What a bunch ofred shirts - those frickers were walking across Bishop-Grandin blindfolded!"

Shooting The 11 - doing something bad/dangerous/forbidden. eg. "Miss an episode of Math With Marty? I'd sooner shoot the 11!"

J.F. Minty - similar to "Rock Lobster", this phrase is substituted for theword "excellent" when describing something that is particularly good. eg. "The Fat Boy Special tastes J.F. Minty!"

Older/Hungrier/Uglier/Etc. than Moses - use this expression with any verb toexpress an extreme - if you were REALLY hungry, you would be "Hungrier than Moses".

Older/Hungrier/Uglier/Etc. than Grandma Moses - when something is REALLY,REALLY, REALLY extreme, it can be said to be Older/Hungrier/Uglier thanGrandma Moses. Use only in VERY extreme cases. eg. "Man alive, the Neuromancer's penis is longer than Grandma Moses!"

Meat Pies Tonight! - used to express anticipation and/or excitement. eg. "My girlfriend's parents are out of town and I'm going over to her house at 8:00! Meat Pies Tonight!". Does not have to be used in a sexual sense, eg. "The new Kids in the Hall episode is on at 9:30! MMmmmm... Meat Pies Tonight!"

Flying Pig - something that no longer exists can be said to have gone the way of the flying pig. eg. "After that last exam, my GPA has gone the way of the flying pig!"

Randall! - something you shout just before you head blows up due to a grenade placed in your mouth. More commonly used to express total destruction of something, eg. "Hot Cheese! I really randalled my Jeep when I ran into that parked truck!"

Hot Cheese! - A bastardization of "Aw jeez", used to express displeasure. eg. "Hot Cheese, I forgot my Big Grip at home!"

Jesus (pronounced Hey-Zeus) - the correct pronounciation of the word Jesus, "Hey-Zeus" should be substituted for the original pronounciation at all times.

evYl - This is the correct spelling of the word "evil" and should be substituted at all times.

Gib/Mackeen/LOM points - awarded to others when they make stupid mistakes. More specifically, Gib points are awarded for acts of general stupidity. Mackeen points are awarded to those who make gross mathematical errors, such as an error in the addition of two 1-digit numbers or stating "All 6 of us are hungry!" when only 3 people are present. LOM points are awarded for acts of exceptional sillyness, such as driving your car into snowbanks, ditches and parked buses.

Bonus points - awarded for really Rocky Lobster actions, especially acts that lead to others receiving Gib/Mackeen/LOM points. If you are keeping a running total of someone's Gib/Mackeen/LOM points, each bonus point cancels a previously acquired Gib/Mackeen point. It takes 10 bonus points to cancel 1 LOM point.

Man Alive! - use to express frustration, excitement or amazement. eg. "Man alive, I've been waiting in line for 3 hours!" or "Man alive, that's one fine head of hair you have!"

Gravy - symbolic of extreme manhood. eg. "I'll bet my left nut that Arnold Schwartzenegger has gravy instead of blood."

Moth - an ancient symbol of death, to "MOTH" someone you write moth on your fingers and shout "MOTH" while pointing your fists at the person you wish to destroy. Can be used to express anger, frustration or hatred.

Frick - the all-purpose substitute swear word, should be substituted for all other "bad words" at all times. eg. "Eat frick and die, frickers!"

Marty Green - Host of "Math With Marty". Infinitely cool people can be said to be "a Marty". Usually used to insult someone with an ego bigger than Moses, eg. "Who does that guy think he is, Marty Green?"

Daddy O - use to address other hip people. eg. "Hey Daddy-O, pass the corn chips."

Barry O - not to be confused with Daddy-O. An extremely geekish person is a Barry O. To communicate to others that someone is a Barry O, point to them and then drop to one knee while making a big "O" with your arms. This will allow you to silently warn others of a geek's presence without offending the unsavory person.

L - when you do something extremely dumb, you can be said to have "Tacked a big L on your forehead". This expression is generally accompanied by the forming of the letter L with one's right hand. Forming a backwords L with your left hand will only serve to make you an even bigger loser in the eyes of your comrades. eg. "Man alive, I really tacked a big L onto my forehead when I drove the wrong way up that one-way street!"

Talking Moses - to be drunk.

Talking TO Moses - to be REALLY drunk.

To BE Moses - to be at a stage of life-threatening drunkenness.

Kushmoogied - when something (your computer, your car, your cerebrum after a night of heavy drinking) has been really destroyed, it can be said to have been "Kushmoogied". eg. "Boy, that 10-gauge shotgun really kushmoogied that chickadee!" or "After I drank those 23 Tequila Paralyzers, I was totally Kushmoogied!"

Keep your eyes off my fries - similar to "fuck off", to be used whenever someone is infringing on your personal territory/possesions.

Chicken Butt! - the automatic response to anyone who asks you "Do you know what?". Can substitute butt for any other body part that rhymes with the last word that was said to you. eg Q: "Do you want to go out?" A:"Chicken snout!"; Q:"Why?" "Chicken thigh!"

Rhymes with Orange - whenever some smart-ass decides to play the 'chicken butt game' with you start ending all your sentences with 'orange'. Chicken smorange is not an acceptable response and storage does not rhyme with orange!

Poker - Anytime someone mentions the words poker or any other word with the suffix 'er' that makes sense you answers either:
a) "You brought her, you poke her!" or
b) "Poke her? I didn't even know her!

Rectum - similar to Poker, used when the word rectum is used in everyday conversation. eg. "Rectum?!? Damn near killed him!!"

Hep - a statement of agreement. eg. "I'm hep with that".

Hands to Mallets - when you disbelieve a statement that somebody made you respond with "Yeah whatever, hands to mallets."

Have a Hockey Puck! - a negative response to an object of someone. eg. "Your ideas/rhymes/pants suck! Have a hockey puck!"

Crack out the duct tape - When an accident occurs or something goes horribly wrong you must 'crack out the duct tape' in order to repair the damage. Best used in situations that seem hopless, as there is no problem duct tape can not solve.

Box shot - Referring to seeing a certain part of a woman's anatomy. eg:
"Hey, Shannon Doherty is in this months Playboy!"
James: "Yeah, No box shots!"

Blessed by the Hooter Fairy - Fairly self-explanitory.

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